Bed time kisses

So, Ben goes in spurts where he likes to lick my face instead of kiss me. While we were getting ready for bed, I asked him for a kiss. He walked over and kissed me. The lights were out in his room, so I couldn't see his face, but it was abnormally slimy.
He smiled really big and said, "That was a kiss and a lick!"
We laughed at him, and I said, "Can I have a nice kiss on the cheek?"
He came over and licked me again. So, I grabbed him and licked his cheek.
He stood up, wiped off his face, and said, "I'm a boy. People don't lick boys. That's really gross!"

Another prayer story

We went to Kraynaks today with my brother and sister-in-law, niece, mom, and the kids. We had a great time! While there I hurt my finger in a tragic cart accident. I don't know what I did, but it involved a pop and now it's swollen and bruised. I was telling Jeremy about it on the way home. Ben heard us talking and asked what happened.
Ben: "Mom, did your finger hurt? Did it pop? Is it bruised? Do you want me to pray for it when we get home?"
Me: "Yes, my finger hurts. Yes, it popped. Yes, it's bruised. Of course, I want you to pray for it when we get home!"
When we sat down for prayers tonight, I asked him if he would pray for it. He said, "Thank you God, for making Mommy's finger all better."
Then, he looked at me and said, "Can you pray for my kids?"
(Because Jeremy and I are both teachers, we always say we have to go to school to work with our kids. Benjamin now has "kids" and a "teacher" of his own.)
Me: "Of course, I can pray for your kids what's wrong?"
Ben: "All of their fingers popped!"
We prayed for his kids fingers to get better!

War of 1:00

There was a HUGE battle this afternoon for a nap. Benjamin was NOT having it. We did everything, but most things ended in screaming and NOTHING resulted in sleep.
At one point I took him into my bed and laid down next to him, hoping that he would give in. Instead, he laid with his eyes open staring at the wall, window, ceiling, etc.
I said, "Benjamin, close your eyes."
He moved his eyeballs so that he was looking down and said, "They are closed."
Me: "No, you're just looking down."
Ben: "No, I'm not. I closed my eyes."
Me: "This is how you close your eyes." (I manually shut his eyes for him.)
Ben: "No it's not."
Me (again): "This is how you close your eyes" (I shut my eyes.)
Ben (squinting): "Like this?"
Me (giving up): "Yes. GO to sleep!"

Just like mom

There aren't many times when Benjamin and I say things that are very similar. He's so much like his dad! However, he changed that today.
I don't know about anyone else, but anytime my brother and I competed as kids I always ended up quitting. I figured I couldn't lose if I wasn't playing.
That strategy still works for me today. When Jeremy starts winning (or starts off winning), I quit so he can't win. He counts it as a win, but I reply "oooooh you beat me and I wasn't even playing." I always take the mature route! Ben has taken a similar route - all though a little more mature.
Every night, Ben and Jeremy race to the sink for Ben to brush his teeth. They start in any number of places and Ben says, "Ready, set (he starts to run), go!"
Tonight, he didn't race. He rode on Jeremy's back. When they got to the sink, Jeremy declared victory. Ben replied, "You can win tonight. I wasn't racing."
As I type this, Jeremy and I have continued the argument. While I clarified Ben's quote, Jeremy said, "He's like you. He lets me win because he doesn't want to play."
Me: "I don't let you win. You can't beat someone who isn't playing."
Jer: You know who says that? Losers!"

I'm big now, Mom

Benjamin has been telling us now that he is three, he's bigger. He actually told me that he felt taller when he woke up the day of his birthday!
Today he went to the doctor for his 3 year check up. Dr. Guru had him jump on one foot, walk on his heels, and do some other things. Now, he's officially BIG.
He's helped pick up today - he did boss his sister, which caused a few arguments! He does a lot now that he's BIG.
As we were getting ready for bed, we were putting stickers on his door.
Background: In an attempt to establish a routine, Jeremy and I decided to give Ben stickers every night on a chart. He gets stickers for picking up toys, brushing teeth, reading, sleeping in his own bed, and not getting time outs. The chart was a great idea, but he didn't get that the stickers went in the neat columns that I made under the cute pictures. He filled the page with stickers, and then his door. Now, he has a beautifully stained door covered with Clifford, smile faces, jackolanterns, Spiderman, you name it.
Anyway, he put his stickers on his door, and turned to turn out his light. I'm pretty sure yesterday he couldn't reach that light! I said, "Ben, thank you for turning that out."
His reply: "I'm big now, Mom."

Not sure I can handle having a "preschool aged" child!

Ben's prayer

Ben: Thank you God for my family. Thank you for my friends. Thank you for Grammy. Thank you for Aunt Ra. Thank you for my fishies to be gone.
Dad, are my fishies gonna be gone?
Jer: Yeah, I think they are gonna die.
Ben: Then we get new fishies?
Jer: Yeah, we'll get new fishies soon.
Ben: Thank you God for my family. Thank you for God. Thank you for Jesus. Thank you for my fishies to be gone, so I can get new fishies.
Daddy, can I get new fishies?
Jer: Ben, are you done praying?
Ben: Yes. Amen.

out of the habit

I've been trying to discipline myself to stay off facebook and my computer. Because of that I've been trying to not bring my computer into my bedroom when I'm going to bed, so if I don't blog before that I forget. I've gotten out of the habit of writing things down.
So many things have happened. Ben had his birthday. We bought Ben fish. Ben's fish are slowly dying off! Really exciting stuff!
So, life has been exciting in the Burnett house. As things get crazy I'll do my best to keep up with the funny stories. Here are a few.
My mom and I made plans for her to come over for dinner tomorrow. She's home alone on Thursday nights and Jeremy has conferences tomorrow until late. However, she forgot that she'd already made plans to go somewhere later that evening. She came running up to me at church with an almost panicked look that freaked me out. She grabbed my hand, opened it up, and hit herself in the head with it. Then she told me she'd double booked herself.
I told her it wasn't a big deal and that she freaked me out more than anything because I thought something was wrong.
I told Jeremy that story in the car on the way home. Ben heard and asked question, but I just told him Grammy was silly.
While we were saying prayers, he said, "Is Grammy's head okay?"
Me: "Yeah, Grammy's head is fine."
Ben: "Did you just like shake it or something?" (now Jeremy and I realize what he's talking about!)
Me: "No, she came to me and went like this" (I put my hand in his hand and hit him in the head.)
Ben: "Why she do that?"
Me: "Grammy's crazy!"

A Ben story as told to me by Jeremy (What Jeremy said was actually funnier than what happened)
Jeremy came out of the bathroom and told me this:
So, Ben was reading my book while he was sitting on the pot yesterday. (When Ben has to poop he likes to have reading material. Usually he "reads" whatever Jer reads while Jer poops!) Then he used my bookmark to wipe his butt!
I gave him a funny look. Jeremy continued:
Yes, my bookmark was a piece of toilet paper, but that's besides the point!

Body parts again

I was changing Hadley's diaper this evening and she'd pooped A LOT. Ben asked where her butt was. I made a general sweeping motion with my hand and said, "Right there."
Ben: Why?
Me: Because God put it there.
Ben: Does God live in her butt?
Me: No, God doesn't live in her butt.
Ben: Does God live in my butt?
Me (attempting a theological conversation with an almost 3 year old (in less than 24 hours :(): Well, God doesn't live in your butt. He lives in your heart after you ask him to be your savior.
Ben: Oh.
How that didn't end with more questions, I don't know. I think God knew I didn't really know what to say yet! He did relay the story to my cousin Alley - and if you've never heard Ben tell a story you are missing out.
Ben: I say 'Is God in my butt?' Mommy say, (in a really funny voice imitating me) 'No, God's not in your butt.
Alley: Where is God?
Ben (with a slight duh in his voice): In your heart!

It's getting bigger

This is another blog that is not for the faint of heart.
My sister was over tonight and she was helping me get the kids ready for bed. Benjamin has a few pairs of underpants, also known as unders, that are getting a little small. Cara was trying to pull them up over his butt and accidentally snapped him - in the "front."
He cried a little, looked at me and said, "Mom, Aunt Ra hurt my dinger."
I said, "You're okay, babe. Your unders snapped you."
Ben: "Why?"
Mom: "You're growing. Your dinger is getting bigger."
Ben (to Jer with underwear fully covering ALL body parts): "Dad, my dinger's getting bigger. Look."
Jer: Gives Ben the "Jer look"

It's Bedtime

Jeremy brought Ben home a book that he thought would be good to read before bed. Our usual bed time routine involves reading a book and then reading something from the Bible.
Jeremy got a book from another teacher about a little boy named Ben who is getting ready for bed. Ben didn't want to go to bed alone, but he didn't want any of the toys his mom offered him. This book was extremely true to our daily routine.
Jeremy didn't actually read the entire book, he just saw that it was about Ben and brought it home.
We sat down to read it together tonight. Benjamin was captivated as Jeremy read about Ben in the book not wanting his dog, or his bunny, or anything. What Ben really wants to sleep with is ...
a scary looking stuffed monster complete with a pointed spikey tail and crazy teeth. Ben's reasoning for this is that it will scare all of the monsters and ghosts away and keep him safe.
Benjamin asked a number of questions about the monsters picture: "Why's his tail like that?" "Why are his teeth like that?" "What's he doing?"
We played it off as just a crazy teady bear and he fell asleep without asking any other questions. Although, I have laid all blame on Jeremy for bringing home the scary book that says Monsters will keep you safe (after we've had lots of conversations about Jesus keeping you safe) and he will be fielding any questions that come from it!


Bonus Benism:
Ben and Jeremy were looking at the stars after church tonight.
Jer: Ben do you know who made those stars?
Ben: Yeah.
Jer: Who made them?
Ben: God made the stars.
Jer: Did you know God knows all of their names?
Ben: Yeah.
Jer: You do? What are their names?
Ben: They're stars.

Best friends

After dinner this evening, Jeremy and I were trying to get things cleaned up. Jeremy was packing up left overs and I was trying to get somethings cleaned up so that I could get Hadley out of her high chair.
She started to fuss and wiggle to get out. I asked Ben to talk to her and keep her company.
He sat in my chair and pulled the high chair close. He talked to her and asked her questions, and tried to show her her ears - Jeremy told Ben that we need to teach Hadley where her ears and nose are (Hadley did find her ears at dinner with a handful of cottage cheese).
It was a sweet moment. He is a great brother!

Three Bears

So the last few days have been so ridiculously crazy! Ben doesn't know what to do! He keeps asking where we are going to day or what we are doing.

We went to see my sister at Malone on Saturday. On the way home my mom tried to entertain him by telling him the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears. That resulted in some of the following questions:
Mom: There were three bowls of porridge on the table. Do you know what porridge is Ben?
Ben: Yeah.
Mom: What's porridge?
Ben: What's porridge?
Mom: You tell me.
Ben: You tell me.
Mom: Porridge is a fancy word for soup.
Ben: Why did they have porridge? Why was the porridge too hot? Why did Goldilocks eat the porridge? Why did Goldilocks go in the house? What did Papa Bear say? Why did the chair break? What did Papa Bear do with the chair? Why did Baby Bear cry? What's porridge?

It's a mushroom

I haven't been on in 3 days! It's sad to say, but two of those days I wasn't with Ben or Hadley long enough to get a funny story!
Last night was a long night. We took the kids back to Bloomfield to watch me play in the student staff charity volleyball game -which the staff won, by the way! Afterwards (and now 12 hours later) I could hardly move. I'm so sore. I helped get the kids in bed and laid down with a rice bag.
Jeremy and I started watching M*A*S*H, when we heard little footsteps coming across the living room. Ben walked up to Jer and said, "Look what's on my finger."
Jeremy: "Is that a booger?"
Ben (obviously trying to think on his feet): "It's a... It's a .... a... It's a mushroom I think."
Jeremy: "Did it come from your nose?"
Ben: "Yes."
Jeremy: "Theeen it's a booger."

I know Jeremy has more to add to that, so make sure you read the comments. When he gets up I'll add more!

Avoiding sleep

I have written a number of times about bedtime. While it has been getting better, there are times that this is the most stressful time of the day. There is almost always crying from one room or the other, and occasionally screaming. There are potty breaks. There are requests for water. There are a lot of things going on!
Although it hasn't happened for a while, sometimes Ben will sneak into Hadley's room and play with her if she's awake, or wake her up sneaking around. Hadley had been crying for a while when Ben came out to use the potty. Jeremy sent him back to bed because he went twice before bed.
I heard giggling. This was the first clue that something was wrong. Bed time NEVER induces giggling! Then I heard two separate giggles! Jeremy went to check on who was giggling and their location. As he left our bedroom, Ben came out of Hadley's room with his finger in the air. He walked up to Jeremy, showed him his finger, and said "Hadley just bited my finger."
He said it with such conviction - as if she was going to get in trouble for biting.
Jeremy put Ben to bed after a strong conversation about not being in his sister's room. Then he stopped at Hadley's door, told her to sleep and quit biting her brother!

Advice for Papa

My brother-in-law Andrew got a deer this evening. He stopped by to show us the deer and pick up the dinner I owed him for watching my kids on Friday. To his credit, he didn't ask for the dinner, I offered it because he saved us!
Ben asked a TON of questions about the deer.

• Why did Andrew shoot that deer?
• What's Andrew gonna do with that deer?
• Why did he shoot it?
• Why did Andrew shoot that big deer?
  

Are you sensing a theme!
I told him Andrew likes to hunt. The reply: Why did Andrew hunt that big deer? I really wasn't winning. So I told him, "Andrew's gonna go home and cut that deer up and put it in the freezer. Then, he's going to eat it later." For whatever reason, that satisfied his curiosity.
A little while later, I was on the phone with my dad. Ben wanted to tell him thank you for the Halloween candy and quarters - My dad's signature is giving out rolls of change for special events. It's the greatest thing. In this case, he gave Ben a roll of dimes, but to him it's all quarters.
Ben said, "Thank you for the candy." That was followed by something that neither of us understood.
Then, the following advice came from Ben (out of the mouths of babes):
"Andrew shot a big deer. You need to shoot a big deer. He's going to cut it up and put it in the freezer. Then he's gonna eat it later."
For those of you who know my dad, he did NOT need the advice from an almost 3 year old. Although he did find the humor in it. I am sure that I hinted a touch of disappointment that Andrew got a big deer on some property that is close to one of Dad's hunting grounds... He may be headed out soon!